Well, things have not been exactly going well, though you keep thinking that it is... I seriously feel that I am drifting apart and that is not good... I have never felt this way in any relationship before... Maybe my expectations were too high hence the disappointment... Maybe I am just fated not to get a romantic and caring guy of my dreams... Haiz, why does life have to be like this? It is like my friends have such nice boyfriends and stuff... I do not demand for an extremely gorgeous and hot hunk and stuff, but just one that would be there for me in times of need...
I thought you were my fairytale
My dream when I am not sleeping
A wish upon a star that is coming true
But when everyone else could tell
That I confused my feelings with the truth
When there was me and you
These lyrics hit me hard when I was listening to the song... Haiz... What can I do now? I start to feel that being single and me again is what I want... Well, the grass is always greener on the other side right? The bottom part of this song is worse, hence I shall not put it... I really do not know what to do or what I want... It is like I just suddenly got a tight slap in my face saying please wake up and prioritise... Maybe I am not ready for a relationship at all, and for the times that we were together, I was just clinging on to the glimpse of hope that we were going to make it...
Now, I seriously do not know whether we can make it or not... Yes I am trying to give this relationship another chance... but I have been hurt, and I need much time to heal... You cannot possible expect me to recover immediately because you treat me with so much care all of a sudden... Ironically, I feel scared, because I know that this is not your original self...
I do not want both of us to be fake... If I have control myself in front of you or you have to control youself in front of me, then I think we should not be together... It is like trying to tame a wild tiger... It is not a matter of compromising and accommodating, but it is more of whether our characters match or not...
You say you see a bright future ahead, but sad to say I really do not... I feel that I do not deserve a hot guy like you, but someone who is more supportive and demure does... I am a wild girl, whereas you are a refined man... See the difference? I am trying real hard to give us another chance, but I cannot promise that it would turn out well... I seriously hope that both of us are prepared for the worst...
Not trying to scare you, but I rather we have a short yet happy moment together then a long and painful road to walk on... I hope you understand what I am saying though I know that you do not read my blog... I am seriously in a dilemma now and it is affecting me bad... I feel insecure and lost... Choices have consequences and I am afraid, terrified that if I make the wrong move, I will regret for life... Yes I might be thinking too much, but don worry... They are all thoughts and I will still love life as it is...
Then now I am listening to S Club Goodbye... And it goes like that...
Nothing last forever though we want it to
The road ahead holds different dreams for me and you
Sometimes goodbye no regrets in your heart
Is the only way to destiny
Sometimes goodbye no regrets
Is the only way meant for you and me
Well it is the hardest thing to say
I miss your love in every way
So say goodbye
Oh don't you cry
Cause TRUE LOVE NEVER DIES...
Maybe I am just a girl whom you will meet and come across before meeting the right one... Well, we never know right... Haiz... Sorry to have given you much stress, unhappiness and distraction... But I believe that we had our happy moments together too right... Well, always look on the bright side of life... Ironically I am not doing it, but I will...
Let us just leave it to fate and see what happens... No matter what, no one should be blamed...
Too tired, emotionally and mentally...
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment